Getting Started
Thank you so much for considering Resilient Kids. Taking steps to improve yourself, family, or kids is a big decision. If you're new to therapy, I'm sure you have many questions. I've added a list of frequently asked questions for new clients.
If I did not answer your question, please contact me! I want you to feel comfortable, so ask me as many questions as you would like.
What is Therapy?
What are some signs that my child/teen needs therapy?
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They are defiant, disobedient, or angry -
Verbally or physically aggressive or throwing temper tantrums -
Hyperactive, impulsive, unable to concentrate or disruptive at school -
Engaging in unsafe behaviors or could lead to dangerous outcomes or trouble with the law -
Worried, fearful, excessively sad, suffering from low self esteem or having problems making friends -
Your children frustrate you. -
You are struggling to find effective discipline methods. -
You need some support and guidance in gaining confidence in your parenting
What should I tell my child about going to therapy?
Giving your child plenty of information about what to expect will help reduce any anxiety related to going to therapy. There are tips of what to say:
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Tell your child that he/she will come to see someone to help him/her feel better (about school, friends, etc.), feel less (sad, angry, scared...), get along better with (friends, sibling, etc.) or help them with a (change, loss, problem, etc.)
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Tell your child he/she will come to a room and it may have some toys to play with while they talk -
Tell your child that this time is not a test or an exam. He/she is not expected to do anything but to talk and listen and there are no wrong answers! -
Explain that sometimes the therapist may talk to mom/dad/grandmother/etc. before or after they talk to them. This is to help the therapist find out how to help you -
Tell your child that this time will usually last between 45 mins and an hour -
Tell your child the therapist will try not to tell other people about what you do or talk about during your time together -
Tell your child that the therapist is not a doctor or a nurse and will not give them shots or medication -
Tell your child he/she can decide if therapy is something they want to talk about outside of session. He/she can tell whomever they want but they don’t have to tell anymore if they don’t want to
What are somethings that I shouldn't tell my child about going to therapy?
- Don’t tell your child that he/she is bad
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Don’t tell your child that he/she is the problem -
Don’t tell your child that he/she is sick or that they are visiting the doctor -
Don’t tell your child that someone will watch what they do and them give advice -
Don’t tell your child to listen to the therapist whatever he/she is asked to do -
Don’t tell him/her to behave in session (if this is a concern, I'd rather see the behaviors in order to be most helpful) -
After the session, don’t as your child “Did you behave?”, “Did you help with cleaning up”, etc. -
Don’t give your child any pressure to talk about his/her problems, etc. -
Don’t tell your child how much the session costs or that it is expensive, etc. this may increase children’s worries or anxieties about their “performance” in session. This may also lead to the child feeling guilty or blamed.
How should I tell my child that they will be starting therapy?
Kate Scharff wrote a wonderful article for the Huffington Post with some tips.
Don’t raise the issue of therapy when either of you is angry or upset, especially immediately following an argument or crisis (such as suspension from school). If she’s riled up, your daughter won’t be able take in what you’re saying. And if you’re angry, she’ll view therapy as a punishment.
Tell your child what you see that has you worried. Try, “Honey, I know you’ve been getting into a lot of fights at school,” or “Seems like you’ve been having a lot of nightmares lately.”
Tell your child you know he’s unhappy and you want to help. For example, say “It must be upsetting when the other kids are angry at you,” or “Nightmares can be really scary. No one likes to be scared.”
Once you’ve identified the problem and offered compassion, tell your child you’ve found someone who can help. You might offer “Sometimes when children feel scared a lot of the time, it helps to go to a person whose job it is to help kids understand their feelings and worries by talking and playing about them. Mom and I went to meet a person like that last week. Her name is Dr. Kelly and she’s really nice. She’s a doctor for feelings, not for your body. We think if you met with her a few times it might help you understand why you’ve been having those nightmares. Then you won’t have to feel scared anymore.”
No matter how gentle you are, your child may growl “There’s nothing wrong with me!” or “I don’t get nightmares anymore!” Remain calm and stay the course with an answer such as “Ok, if you and Dr. Kelly decide you’re not scared anymore Dad and I will be very happy. But we love you, and for now this is what we think is best.”
It’s a tall order, but resist the urge to ask for reports. Questions like “What did you and Dr. Kelly talk about today?” are likely to produce either silence or an answer designed to please. Let your child’s therapy be a private place, and use your meetings with the therapist to get and share information about how things are going.
When difficulties arise, there’s nothing wrong with gently suggesting that your child talk about them in therapy. If your daughter gets in a fight at school you might say “You know, Honey, if you feel like talking with Dr. Kelly about what happened she might be able to help you with the problems you’re having on the playground.” But try not to bring therapy up too often, or your child will feel you’re intruding or using her therapist as an ancillary parent. If there’s something you want the therapist to know, the best bet may be to get in touch directly. But inform your child beforehand, so she won’t feel the adults are conspiring.
A comment like “If you don’t start cooperating I’m going to have a talk with Dr. Kelly” is counterproductive. Here’s a better approach: “Lately you seem angry whenever I ask you to help out, and we haven’t been able to talk about it. Fighting is no fun. I think it would be a good idea for us to talk to Dr. Kelly about ways we can get along better.”
Fees & Insurance
Do you take my insurance?
What if you don't take my insurance?
Not to worry! Many clients are able to utilize their out-of-network benefits for counseling services and get reimbursed by their insurance company. I will provide you with a copy of a superbill which you can submit for possible reimbursement. I also encourage you to verify your out-of-network benefits prior to your session. If you have access to HRA/FSA/HAS funds, I accept those funds as forms of payment. Depending upon the carrier, reimbursements are usually received between 2-3 weeks after submission.
How do we pay?
Fees are paid in full at the time of service. Payment is accepted in the form of cash, check, or credit card (Visa & MasterCard). As a healthcare provider, we accept Health Savings Account (HSA) and Flexible Spending Account (FSA).
How do I verify my benefits?
1) Have your insurance card nearby
•“What is the annual deductible?” “How much has been met to date?”
•“What is the percentage paid after deductible is met?”
•“What is the co-payment or co-insurance amount?”
•“Is referral from Primary Care Physician or Medical Group required?” (Usually HMO)
•“Where do we mail Behavioral Health claims?”
•“Is precertification required?” If no, you're all done, that's it! If a pre-authorization is needed, you have one more step:
• “What is the authorization start date and end date (Be sure to disclose your first session date, if you know it, so it will be included in authorization.)
• “How many sessions are authorized?"
•“Where do we mail claims?” (IMPORTANT: This is often a different address than the one used in cases where precertification is NOT required).
Sessions & Rates
All new potential clients receive a free initial 15 minute consultation prior to scheduling an intake session via phone.
Individual or Family Therapy session (45-55 minutes) $125
No show/cancellation within 24 hours $50
Equine Assisted Psychotherapy
Where is the farm?
The farm is located in Middletown, DE approximately 10 minutes from our office location. Once approved for equine assisted psychotherapy, the address will be disclosed to you.
Can I stop by to see the farm or visit in between sessions?
We totally understand wanting to say "hi" to our horses, we do not allow visits. Due to confidentiality needs of clients, visitors are welcome only during pre-arranged times.
Do you conduct therapeutic riding classes for people with disabilities?
We do not, but The Center For Therapeutic Riding in Townsend, DE does. They also offer programs for the wellness of individuals affected by cancer, and an adult day program for those living with physical or cogntive impairments. Visit them at : www.thecenterfortherapeuticriding.com
Can I continue to see my therapist and have sessions of Equine Assisted Psychotherapy?
Yes. In fact we are currently only seeing clients who also have an in-office therapist. We follow your therapist's current treatment plan during EAP sessions.
How many sessions does it take?
Similiar to other treatment styles, it depends. In general, we have found that a natural ending point usually emerges somewhere between 4 and 10 sessions.
What does it cost?
Since each session requires two professionals, horses and the facility, rates are higher than in-office therapy. Full-cost per-session is $225. A portion of this fee may be reinbursed to you through out-of-network benefits. Please see the "finances" section for more about out-of-network benefits.
What do I need to bring or wear?
Boots are suggested, but sneakers are fine. No open-toed shoes. You may want to bring a water bottle, a hat and sunscreen.
What about bad weather?
In case of bad weather that requires rescheduling, we will contact you (please check your phone). For some clients, we can provide services inside the barn, even if it is raining outside.
I'm interested... What next?
What is Equine Assisted Therapy?
Equine Assisted Psychotherapy (EAP) is an emerging field that uses horse-human interactive experiences to facilitate emotional growth and learning. Like all experiential approaches, it must be experienced to be understood; the words on this page cannot do it justice. We can say that participants learn about themselves and others by participating in activities with the horses, and then processing (or discussing) feelings, behaviors, and patterns with a trained therapist and equine specialist.
The focus of EAP is not riding or horsemanship. In fact, 100% of EAP takes place purely on the ground. The focus of EAP involves setting up activities involving the horses that require the client or group to apply certain skills – such as assertiveness, self-awareness, patience, creativity, and teamwork – as they interact with the horses. By observing old habits in the arena, and experimenting with new possibilities, people gain practical insight that they can use to change their lives.
Why horses?
People who have been around horses tend to “get” that there is “just something about them” the runs deep. For those that haven’t, here are some insights that might help answer this question… Horses have a large presence that evokes our fears, hopes and yearnings. They are social and curious and interact with people in a variety of ways that inevitably stir up our strengths and weaknesses. Horses see through posturing and aren’t concerned with a person’s class, race or religion; they tune into deeper intentions. Horses are intuitive and present here and now; they respond instantly to the humans around them, almost like biofeedback machines. In essence, horses do naturally what every good therapist strives to do: tune in to peoples’ inner experience, and challenge them to grow.
What are the benefits of EAP?
What are the Benefits of Equine Therapy?
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Assertiveness -
Emotional awareness -
Empathy -
Stress tolerance -
Flexibility -
Impulse control -
Problem-solving skills -
Self-actualization -
Independence -
Self-regard -
Social responsibility -
Interpersonal relationships -
Respect for self and others -
Improved communication and social skills -
Boundary setting -
Empathy towards others - Honesty & trust
- Overcoming challenges in a non-threatening atmosphere
Who can benefit from EAP?
Equine assisted psychotherapy is a powerful and effective therapeutic approach that can have incredible impacts on individuals, youth, families, and groups. EAP addresses a variety of mental health and human development needs including depression and anxiety, behavioral issues, eating disorders, interpersonal relationships and anger issues. It can also be used for families —including parenting and relationship conflicts — and as a way to improve teamwork in organizations and businesses. During the initial phone interview, we will determine together if this approach is suitable for your situation.
What goes on in an EAP session?
Clients are invited by the EAP team to engage with the horses in tasks (guiding a horse through an obstacle course, for example). But like life, EAP sessions are unpredictable. Your personality and mood will mix with the personality and mood of the horse(s) and the assigned activity to create a unique experience; one that will inevitably stir up feelings, fears, and relationship dynamics – positive and negative – that are at play in your life. Our horse-therapists are very keen at giving clients what it is they seem to need. Marissa (psychotherapist) and Loretta (equine specialist) will be on-hand to support you in getting the most out of the experience.
First Appointment
How do I get my first appointment?
Please submit an intake request through our form online, or give us a call at (302) 752-0393. We will get back to you within 24 hours.
What do I do to prepare for my intake?
1) Verify your mental health benefits through your insurance. Please see "fees and insurance" if you have more questions.
Where is your office located?
Teletherapy (online therapy)
What is Teletherapy?
Therapy options are rapidly growing and Teletherapy is center stage of it.
Is Teletherapy private?
Does Teletherapy work as well as traditional counseling?
What equipment do I need?
(Note: To use a smartphone, you must first download Telehealth by SimplePractice - available for iOS or Android in the app store.)
How does Teletherapy work?
You’ll be sent a link for the video appointment. Click on it when our appointment is scheduled to start or open it through the Telehealth by SimplePractice app (download free in the app store). You can use the camera and audio on your computer or mobile device.
Why should I try Teletherapy?
We are very excited about this new option because it means no waiting and travel time, and you won’t have to take time off work/other priorities, or find a babysitter. Kids no longer have to give up an extra cirricular activity or sport to make it to their appointment, or miss school time. Plus, it’s 100% HIPAA compliant and secure!
How much will it cost?
Your cost for a video appointment will vary depending on the coverage you have with your insurance provider. Most insurances charge a copayment just like traditional appointments, and it most likely will be the same amount. We can determine your exact coverage and what your copay will be before we schedule an appointment.
Will the appointments be recorded?
None of our appointments will ever be recorded or stored.